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1. |
Demolition Meanderer
04:20
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I am the demolition meanderer
behind the crushed and collapsed facades
I add up revealed stairs
If we can see with clarity at last
we can finally know the questions
to ask of our pasts
All the scenes seemed to mean nothing
have added up to this—
staring some statue in the eye
Its brute force smirks at my righteousness
Each day I make do
with my swarming doubts
But I’ve always preferred
a candle blown out
Nothing to say
between two stupid tools
whose uses
can’t be paraphrased away
I’m just some demolition meanderer
among the demolition meanderers
scrape scrape scrape scrape
scrape scrape scrape scrape
in the ruins we play
scrape scrape scrape scrape
scrape scrape scrape scrape
away with the day
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2. |
WTF Is Death
03:45
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My old friend
got an ambulance chauffeur
Its siren styled traffic
Like a smiling lion tied to a spike
lacking the language to explain
its own rope’s circumference
Death doesn’t make any sense
Death doesn’t make any sense
still God’s indivisible indifference
Is a win-win situation
There’s these really silly Big Mysteries
in the middle of everything
Like what the fuck is death
It doesn’t make any sense
so long as you continue
to do the best you can possibly do
at being you
Death doesn’t make any sense
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3. |
True Song
09:46
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Many many moons ago in my string bean speed years
We’d zoom midwest plains to make sunrise anywhere
There must’ve been a year some people came to see us play
How else to explain how my expectations abate
Sam made me a mixtape back in 89:
Front 242, The Cure, De La and Bad Brains
into our 30s we crammed a loft concrete
too fertile and too chipper to admit defeat
High all the time
with Dave's Robot and Everyoned
Our sleeping patterns flipped
our constellations prolonged
Love of Everything
wrote all our favorite songs
Just a decade ago I was a dopey Romeo
indulging my fleshy desperation
to try to feel real
Now the whole civilization’s
serotonin’s depleted
Will Amitabul shutter?
Will Rainbo be defeated?
Maybe 5 years I swaggered two clicks too clever
I’m starting to wonder if that shame will ever shatter
6 weeks one spring, it wasn’t even a thing
But as if she meant what she said
But as if she said what she meant
the words still sting
But now me and Jen have bunkered in Lecce
my cousin’s kitchen
has the highest ceilings
I’ve ever seen
we sat eyes closed and listened
to impeachment hearings
Somehow still shocked
by disingenuous villains
We each dipped a toe
in an Italian hospital
Now we’re finally home
and its unanimous
everyone everywhere’s
everything’s cancelled,
All day we all hearsay
about doomsday stats
So maybe it’s OK
I indulge and glance back
Long ago at Casey’s, I sang this line:
“I’m singing this in my friend’s kitchen.”
15 years now in Australia he’s living
He introduced me around
and shared his deep cut fortune
That old song continues with Sam singing backing
"We keep beginning again and again,
longing to belong to
only each new beginning"
Sam’s feeling at home
in the desert he’s living
All our past lives
don’t reveal that they don’t last
until they do
“We keep beginning again and again,
longing to belong to only each new beginning”
So I strut past and continue, scrape away residue
Strut past the residue scrape away and continue
Turning down cash
for reunion shows
I wish were possibly possible
more than anyone knows
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4. |
Completeness
05:01
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I can’t understand
why
I can’t understand
who was that man
I became
in response to you
I am not that way
You made me that way
And I still can’t understand
Ah the goddamn
completeness
of the image
of my beloved
But I still can’t understand
how
I can’t understand
and it was true— we did or we didn't
we could or we couldn’t
but it was true
I was that me that I still am
Are you still that you?
Ah the goddamn
completeness
of the vision
of my beloved
I get it now
how you told me how
time deepens
in each other’s presence
and now later, slowly,
so much goddamn later
I also now
I get it how
time also deepens
in each other’s absence
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